Ever since The Sixth Sense, movie studios have come down with a serious case of twist fever. Which if not treated immediately (with quality twists), can turn into a bigger sickness and sometimes lead to amputation of the lower extremities. Or worse, someone loses their job because they back a sucky movie that has a quality twist.
It seems nowadays movies have to have a twist to get the audience interested. Twists are now becoming the focus of advertising campaigns (Shutter Island, A Perfect Getaway). The problem is, it gets people guessing. Real movie critics/fans like myself immediately set the wheels in motion and often in my case, guess the twist before they see the movie. Two movies this year I had serious hunches on the twists advertised (again Shutter Island and A Perfect Getaway). I got Getaways TWO MINUTES into the movie...I got Shutter Islands within 5 MINUTES...as soon as he reached in his pockets and was missing his cigarettes. This actually ruins movies for me as I am too smart to be twisted. Sarcazmo just may be "twist proof". So in honor of the twist, I present Sarcazmo's top 7 random twist hi-jinx, shenanigans, and milarchy
7. The Sixth Sense. (Not gonna put it at 6 to show how clever I am) The movie that resurrected the twist is actually pretty solid. The best use of "clues" in a movie maybe ever. Great story here about how a studio suit bought the script for $2 million on the spot without consulting his superiors, said superiors didnt believe in the movie, and kept only 13% or so of the films rights. The film went on to gross worldwide $672,806,292...oopsy poopsy. The film also turned actor Haley Joel Osment into the next big child star of tomorrow who grows up to do nothing today.
6. From a Whisper to a Scream. Most gruesome/disturbing twist. Bad horror anthology movie, with one hell of a disturbing ending. A white trash douche/scum-bag type on the lamb from mobster-types gets shot and stumbles into a swamp where he is saved from a shaman/witch doctor-type. While recovering, he discovers the man holds the secret to eternal life. Instead of being patient and learning the ways of the immortal, he drinks the life potion and sinks the witch doctor to the bottom of the swamp. The witch doctor returns though and kills the scumbag by means of amputating his limbs and burning him to death....only we find out that when the scumbag type got shot and was saved, the doctor ALREADY gave him the life juice...he had everlasting life the whole time. The last shot is mega disturbing. Douchebag guy is in hospital with doctors baffled as how is is stil alive, camera cuts to the guy who has no arms, no legs, and burnt to a total crisp. The final shot is of the only eye he has left and a tear rolls down his charred face knowing this is the rest of his life. Warning this movie is not good.
5. The Dream Twist. The biggest cop out type twist is, "the whole thing was just a dream" twist. 
Obviously is was cool in The Wizard of Oz, and between 1985 and 1999 it was the cool twist to do, but nowadays its almost extinct. Its tired... literally and figuratively. To go a whole movie being awed and inspired only to be told the whole thing was a big sham in the end, that someone had milk before bedtime, thus causing a crazy movie dream...its weak. Hollywood seems to have caught on though as you dont see it anymore. The worst dream twist actually came at the beggining of a movie...Robert Zombies Halloween 2. Yes a 20 minute chase sequence ends up being a dream. One of the dumbest things I've seen. Cant believe Zombie would waste 20 minutes instead of spending the money and time on something fun, like expensive sets and clothes for his wife to act badly in.
4. The House That Dripped Blood. Best twist from a movie you'll never see. The story here has an author, along with his wife, working on a novel in a secluded mansion. As he writes, he begins to see the main character (a monster looking guy) in the novel appear and disappear. The creepy guy monster, antagonizes, torments, and kills while only the author can see him. In the end though the twist turns out to be the monster guy is real and has teamed up with the authors wife to drive him to suicide. The authors wife pretended not to see the monster. Pretty clever. Movie was still a load of tripe though. 
3. Mindhunters. Who is the killer twist. Only The Caz a "5th degree twist master" could guess this twist correctly. This $4.4 million dollar grossing FBI agents on an island and one of them is a killer film, is fun. Guessing who the killer is pretty tricky. I thought outside the box on this and guessed correctly. The rules are usually a big star is the killer..why else would they take the role. Here though its different. One of the agents falls into a trap and ALMOST gets killed, thats when I guessed it was him. It happens right in the beginning though, so most people would forget. Underrrated little movie here directed by Renny "A Nightmare on Elm Street 4" Harlin. 
2. April Fools Day and The Game. Fun twists where no one gets hurt. Two movies whose stock will continue to go up in the next 10 years. The overlooked April Fools Day is...well...we need more movies like this . A bunch of kids go to an island house to party, only they're killed one by one by a mysterious killer, only its an April Fools joke. Really cute little horror movie. The Game is solid, Michael Douglas thinks hes been scammed but in the end its just the best birthday present ever. Fun fact...Sean Penns role was originally Jodie Fosters. 1. Sarcazmo tells you how to spot the twist. I've become a "twist master" by adapting and studying my prey (Hollywood screenwriters). There are rules I think Hollywood follows, unfortunately the rules havent changed lately. Heres how to spot a twist.
1. The lead actors are usually involved. If a movie promises a twist and has name actors, its a safe bet they're part of the twist. You have to be shrewd here, would the actor take a simple role or would they take a role that shocks the audience in the end. Examples: Johnny Depp in Secret Window, Mila Jovavich in A Perfect Getaway, Nicole Kidman in The Others, Tom Cruise in Vannila Sky, Brad Pitt in Fight club, etc.
2. Hollywood rarely uses dream twists and dead-the-whole-time twists anymore. When trying to figure out a twist, quickly eliminate dreams and deaths. The Sixth Sense and The Others used up the death twist. Boxing Helena, Vanilla Sky, The Devils Advocate and Mulholland Drive beat -to-death the dream twist.
3. Be weary of supporting roles starring name actors. Ever wonder why in some movies a big star is in a supporting role...they're in on the twist. Examples: Sean Penn in The Game, Kevin Spacey in The Usual Suspects, Mark Ruffalo in Shutter Island, Tim Robbins in Arlington Road.
Bonus Blog: The Twists I didnt get. I'm on at least a 6 movie twist streak where I've guessed the twist early. The last movies with rumored twists I didnt get, were The Village and High Tension. In the case of The Village I was thinking too hard. I knew there was a twist and I had 2 or 3 theories during the movie. My main twist guess was that the monsters...were really gonna be monsters. It would have been a downer of an ending on an epic scale if after Bryce Howard is walking in the woods trying to find help, she gets eaten alive by real monsters. The End.
High Tension. I didnt guess this ending because theres plot holes big enough to drive an ice cream truck thru. The "killer" at one point is riding in the back of the truck...who the hell is driving the truck???
Law Abiding Citizen. My twist guess here was that Gerard Butler and Jamie Fox were in cohoots the whole time. I didnt guess that Gerards character tunneled a mile underneath the prison, while no one noticed. 
Saw 1. No I didnt guess the end here either. One would think if you're laying there for hours straight, trying not to make a sound while two guys fight for their life, you'd have to either breathe, flatulate, move, itch, scratch, sigh, stomach growl, sneeze, cough, piss, dump, laugh, moan, etc. That old Jigsaw sure can stay still. Maybe the best twist ever along with The Sixth Sense. 
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